G u(a) y

A queue at KFC - eagerly waiting to control its drool with a few crispy fried chicken pieces. I'm part of that gluttonous group.

Time was crawling. That was when my eyes caught the movement of the guy in front of me. His eye-brow was pierced. And he was drawling his sweet-talk to his 'guy-friend' in a 'girlish' manner. The tone was laced with tiff: "I waaant extra maionese... Pppppplease. You know how much I lIke it." . He looked at the other guy, with a pair of eyes filled with hope & expectation - as how a girl would look at her guy - waiting for a 'yes'. His stare had the romance, and affection a mate can offer the other. I observed his demeanor for a while. Then my eyes moved from his face to his chest - just to ensure he doesn't have a pair of breasts! He didn't!

“He is definitely a guy, and I'm looking at a gay couple" I mumbled to myself.

WHAT A CATCH!

Ever since I've been following cricket, I've often wondered whether the following scenarios could really happen!!

1. An over that entertains the crowd with six sixes in an international match. Yuvraj and Gibbs did that in the past.

2. A brilliant catch in which the fielder spontaneously, but accurately, judges the trajectory of the ball, and then dives from the boundary line into the field, to grab the ball... thereby taking the wicket. Adam Voges just did something similar to that. Watch his brilliant catch...

The other unbelievable cricketing scenarios that could probably occur in the future are:

3. Scoring 36 runs in the last over to win a match

4. In a India vs Pakistan match, India hitting a six in the last ball, when the asking runs is 6. (Yeah... I can't forget that Miandad 6 at Sharjah)

5. A single bowler belting 10 wickets in a single one-day or T20 international match. Kumble and Jim Laker did that in test match and 1st class test match respectively. I'm wondering who will perform a similar feat in the other versions of the game.

6. Scoring 108 runs in three consecutive overs.

7. A direct hit (and a run out) from a fielder who covers the deep. (I believe this has already happened)

8. Zero runs and 10 wickets (Batting side is back to the pavilion).

9. 20 wickets by a single bowler in a test match.

Do you have anymore to add to this dream list? :-)

Tax on Income against the constitution?

Came across this interesting video, which argues that Income Tax is against the constitution. Not in India, but in USA - the country, which stands for personal liberty, and which has a sizable chunk of people who propounds the libertarian philosophy. The arguments put across in the video are interesting. It is amazing to see the drive, and the rationale behind the drive, to question the government on a 'taken-for-granted' item - i.e. taxation on a person's income. I wish in India too the citizens had the power to go and demand accountability from the MPs, MLAs and the Income Tax Department.

The video is a lengthy one - more than an hour ;-)

My College Campus...

Stumbled upon this video. It's about my college... Felt good to see it :-) Btw, the current campus environment has changed quite a bit...

Railwayconomics

When I woke up in the morning, I saw the old lady making a veiled attempt to open the 'hanging door' of the 3-tier-a/c-compartment. I guessed she wanted to use the rest room. She tried once again. But the stubborn door wouldn't give way. It remained hanging; and it remained stuck! She soon gave up, and slowly walked to the other end of the compartment.

The Netravati Express, in which I was traveling, was chugging towards Goa. I looked at my watch: time 6:30 AM. "Hmmm... time to freshen up" I thought. Half-awake, I climbed down from my berth, unpacked my toiletry bag, picked my toothbrush and paste, and headed towards the hanging door.

"Before I slept, this door was in perfect condition!" With that thought and curiosity I started investigating the door. There it was.... - the top hinge of the door was broken! In the night, probably, someone - eager to relieve himself/herself - might have had attempted pushing the door hard, and in that process might have broken the hinge. I nodded at myself.

"Anyways... let me get to the wash basin" I partly lifted the door and turned it over its healthy hinge. The door opened up for me, and I was out to treat my teeth with the fresh froth of the tooth paste.

By the time I returned, my father was up. He too had observed the door, which was now open, but precariously tilting, and threatening to fall on any passerby's head. He went searching for the attendant. After a few minutes he was back with the attendant. The attendant had some tools with him. Soon he was at it - fixing the broken door. I saw my father striking a healthy conversation with him...

When my father returned, I gave him a look of curiosity. I was interested to know what conversed.

My father read my mind and said "Low quality hinges!! That's why it came out. He says this has been happening since the Railways started its reform under Lalu. In the name of reform, procurement is being carried out from external vendors, which supply low quality materials - Something, as per him, which never used to happen in the past. He thinks Lalu and his coteries are taking a huge cut (read bribe) from these reforms"

"A different perspective of the famed Railwayconomics" I thought...

Luttappi

One of my niece's favorite cartoon hero is Mayavi. Because of that, I obviously find pleasure in pulling her legs by calling her Luttappi, whom she hates.

The “I'm Mayavi, You are Luttappi” fight keeps happening between us... - All this till recently she stumbled upon the fact: that Puttalu is Luttappi's uncle or mamman.

A few days back while I was video-chatting with her, she asked me in a cute manner "Mammanae, do you know who is Luttappi's mamman?"

Amid control laughter I decided not to call her Luttappi hereafter... - a promise hard to keep.

Btw, my niece is turning 4 years tomorrow. Happy birthday Laya...

Yo Momma...

It was just a couple of days since I had joined my engineering college. Ragging was still in vogue.

"What is your name..." The senior asked me in a harsh and threatening manner.

I gave my full name.

He singled out my last name and asked: "Who is he?"

"My father"

"How do you know?!"

I didn't understand his question. Puzzled at his question, I looked at him....

"You mother fucker..., why are you staring at me?! I asked you HOW YOU KNOW HE IS YOUR FATHER!??"

"My mother told me... " I blurted. A stupid answer. But I was in no position to 'think' and give a proper answer. Never in my life I had come across the word - 'mother fucker'. I was reeling under shock and didn't know what to say...

"Will you call anyone your father... whom your mother shows...? *%$#@" The verbal abuse continued for another half an hour

That was how I got introduced to "Yo Momma" abuses and jokes...

Enter 21st century: There are full fledged programs and competitions, such as M-TV's Yo Momma, aired regularly with the sole intention to educate our young generation on how to abuse someone's mother. I think the mission of those channels is so noble! They don't want our kids to get shocked when someone hurls verbal abuses at them and their parents.

God save the young kids from such filthy 'ingenious' programs. And God save the governments, which think such programs need no censorship.

Hit me baby one more time

The couple with whom I was having the conversation appeared to be happy. Need proof? I saw the girl 'playfully' hit the guy a few times and then, threaten him to give a couple of 'tight slaps'. She would call him all sorts of names - stupid, idiot, donkey, monkey etc etc. To which he would giggle and continue pulling her legs. As an encouragement she would hit him for each of his jokes. Some of those 'hits' appeared to be painful ones. But then, I wasn't the one who was receiving those. and hence not the right person to judge its intensity. "Had it pained, that guy would have squinched" I thought. I did notice him skillfully morph a few squinches into laughter. But then, he is a macho, and her hits were probably feather touches!

The constant thrashing went on till we parted.

While heading to my friend's place, the bashing scene kept on replaying in my mind. It wasn't the first time I was seeing such scene. But the ferocity of this one made me think. During old days... that is, during the 80s, a guy hitting a girl was no news. It was definitely considered bad. But such incidents used to happen. Such incidents hardly surprised any. In the 90s, hitting a girl became a taboo... The society would look down upon such a guy. Come to the current decade: hitting the boy friend or husband is the fad of the town. Observe any couple for a while. Chances are high that you will see the girl hit the guy. It is the fashion!! You know! That is how a girl declares her legitimacy and power over the guy! You will see around the guy's neck an invisible board, which declares "punch bag of my girl friend or wife". It reminds me of the dialogue in the movie - He was a quiet man. It goes something like this...

It was easier in the past...
A man knew what it was to be a man...

Then something happened

We passed laws on decency
Lawyers became our shepherds
And what was once a fairly easy thing to understand became muddled in the bureaucracy of what we call 'being civilized'.

Women demanded equality and she got it
Not by getting everything the man had…
But by the man being castrated in the form of order.

I don't care what you say

This is not progress
This is not evolution

Yeah.. public display of hitting... that too in the name of love... is definitely not progress or 'being civilized'. Now, if you are a guy, don't bother asking a girl about what she thinks of hitting a guy. She would most probably declare it as 'cute' and 'loving'!!

There are many times when I've tried to picturize the reverse. That is, the guy hitting the girl and calling her 'donkey' in front of her friends. What could probably happen? Experts in girl psychology say that the world could split into two.

With all those thoughts, and a smile on my lips, I enter my friend's house. He was watching the television. Tata Sky's ad was playing on. The scene: Gul Panag is hitting Aamir Khan with a pillow.

Chaar seat chodkar beithna

Bangalore Passport Office. My friend has to meet the officer for passport related work.

He reaches the office very early in the morning, that is well before the office opens, lest to avoid the rush and queue. Outside the gate, the queue had already started forming. He is third in the queue. "Lucky me" He thinks. He can complete the work sooner than expected.

After half an hour of wait, the gate-man opens the gate. The queue moves in a line to the counter where it is actually supposed to form. There are a few chairs placed near the counter so that people can "sit and wait" instead of "stand and wait". The early birds, including my friend, are about to sit on those chairs when the security officer arrives and sternly says "Chaar seat chodkar beithna", which means "Sit after leaving the 1st four seats".

My friend is obviously puzzled. Why leave the 1st four seats? He thinks about it for a while and then choose to ignore the incident. As the wait continues, he sees a lady alight from a Benz. Clad in an expensive sari and layered in makeup, she walks slowly towards the start of the queue. The security personnel welcomes her with a broad smile and politely asks her to sit it the first chair of the queue – well ahead of those who have been waiting.

"Corruption starts at the lower most rug" My friend thought.

This is also India...

A train journey from Bangalore to Hospet. Time:... around 7 in the morning. In another 1 hour Hospet will be at sight.

A guy - with orange T-shirt - whose berth is next-to-next of mine, is packing in anticipation of alighting soon. He appeared to be affluent. From the iPod, laptop and other electronic gadgets he was using, he appeared to be working for an MNC in Bangalore.

As he was packing, he takes one of the the white bed-sheets, which the Indian Railways offer to its passengers, brings it to his nose, and blows heavily onto it!!! I'm obviously stunned! Can anyone do such a crass act!? Never in my imagination I thought one could! I couldn't believe what I saw! How can a so-called educated person do that?!

I'm yet to believe my eyes when he lifts the next white bed-sheet and blows his nose onto that one too...!! “Bastard” I mumbled. He then, as if nothing happened, merrily packs his personal bed-sheet into his bag! Somewhere in the mid, he takes his handkerchief out and wipes his mustache... “To hell with public property. It should carry my precious mucus.” Was that what he was thinking?

As long as India has people like the one with the orange T-shirt, who has absolutely no civic sense, India will remain nothing but a backward country. Next time when you hear one of those pseudo nationalists harp on the “greatness” of Indian Culture, show them this post. The incident mentioned above is also part of the “great” Indian Culture.

Dumb or Smart?

First an incident... Then two questions.

The incident:

Venue: KFC Indiranagar

I'm scrumptiously gobbling the crispy chicken breast, but occasionally lifting my head to enjoy the CMH junction bathed in night. There is a girl sitting next to my table. She is having a loud animated conversation with her friend. When pieces of her conversation starts flying-in thick and fast, I reduce my pace of hogging, and start paying attention. She is talking about how the date with her prospective-groom went.

"When my mama showed his pic, I didn't want to meet him. But then I thought it is ok. Mama is putting so much effort. But still... I knew something was wrong. I get this feeling by looking at a person... you know what I mean... I'm that sensitive types."

"Oh... yeah?! What a surprise! Almost every girl I've met so far in this universe is 'sensitive' types! Nice to see one more namoona! (piece)" I thought.

"Did he look good?" Her friend asks with a calm voice.

"Yes... But not of my types. Anyways, I meet him. And Oh my God... It was really really funny. He was asking all stupid formal questions. He didn't know anything else to ask. And I was like asking him all questions hoping that, THAT will help him ask some sensible questions." She giggled "And you know what finally happened?" She paused

"What?"

She continued "Before we parted he stopped and asked me my name!! Can you believe it!! Isn't that so dumb!. Like asking his date's name after such a long conversation!! I was like.. WHAT!! I went back and told my mom not to let me meet any such dumbos"
....
....
Her trumpery went on...

Now the question: Was that prospective groom dumb or smart?

I say he was smart. He found the best way to get rid of her: by asking her name as though he forgot!

The next question: Is that girl so dumb not to realize the above mentioned probability? Perhaps yes...

What is in a Name?

“Here everything goes by number. Your employee number is your identity. It is more important than your name.” When I heard my manager, I felt terrible. “There is no value for my name!” - I was surprised. To me this was nothing but a good example of communist principle working through an organization, which is based out of a communist country. “Human beings are not valued. They are just ids and numbers” - I thought sadly

A few months passed...

I was having a friendly chat with my Chinese colleague. During the conversation he elaborated the "name-space-crisis" of China. Each Chinese name consists of three components. The first component is the family name. The second is a "connector" that has a fixed pattern of rotation-and-reuse across generations. E.g. if one's father used the connector 'li' his son will use a different - but usually a pre-defined connector, say 'hong'. The third component is the person's first name.

So... the name Wang-li-dong can be split into Wang, li, and dong. There will be no extra tail or header to that name.

Now the problem: Since there are so many people in China, so many Chinese have the same name. E.g. one can find lot of Zhangwei's in China. When there are so many people with same name, how can an organization or government, address or reach-out-to a specific person? The solution is to give the people numbers, or append an alphabet to their names. My company follows the number convention. Some other companies follow the alphabet convention.

“Hmmm... the number has got nothing to do with communism”. I thought and laughed at myself.

Trying to comprehend...

A wrestler is passing by a street...

A young thug, who is no match to the wrestler, doesn't like his walking style. He hurls verbal abuses at the wrestler. A group of elders, who watch these events unfold, look at each other and continue their boring, mundane and useless conversation. The wrestler too ignores those verbal abuses and walks away. Emboldened by the wrestler's reaction, the young thug repeats the same next day. The wrestler chooses to ignore it again.

The next day the thug - instead of throwing verbal abuses - hurls sharp objects at the wrestler.

How do you think the wrestler should react ?

A) Go, bash the thug

B) Take those hurled objects to those useless elders and crib "The thug threw these at me. I can call my forensic expert to prove it. You must do something!"

Israel opted for option A. Israel is still pounding Gaza for a good reason.

India opted for option B. India is still busy convincing Pakistan and the World, that the Mumbai terror attack was Pakistan's brain child.

Has this type of reaction happened in the past? Yes! To name a few... The Kandahar hijacking, the Mumbai bomb blast, the Parliament attack etc.

"Criticizing the government is easy. That too by sitting in the comforts of a corner offered by Bangalore" - You might think. Nops...! It is not about criticizing! It's about failing to comprehend the government's actions! I can think of many proper quid-pro-quo: i.e. from Naval blockade to severing all ties with Pakistan. Why can't the political leadership think in those lines? Why can't it deliver a fitting reply? Are the Delhi politicians scared that an atom bomb of Pakistan will first fall on Delhi – i.e. on their head? I feel terrible when the Paki "artists" and "entertainers" still keep visiting India with impunity to make money! What is this government doing?

In short... I feel ashamed of India's offensive against the 26/11 perpetrators.

Deshdrohi

Did you watch Kamal Khan's latest movie - Deshdrohi? I didn't. I just saw the trailer. But that was sufficient for me to recognize this new genius of Indian film Industry - Kamal Khan! I was truly inspired and awed by his performance. I can vouch that no actor in India can match his skills. Honestly... trust me!

Did you see how he deliver dialogs. UNPARALLEL!! Yes... it is unparallel to anyone's in the existing film industry. Checkout the scene in which he says: "Mujhe marna manzoor hai. Magar darna mana hai!" What a throw!! Fellows, what a throw... what a throw of dialog!! I had goosebumps. (I think, before he delivered that dialog, he watched Ram Gopal's “Darna Mana Hai”.) And his voice... wah wah...! Not even Amitab Bachan can match it.

His action sequence is the stealer - the quintessence of his performance! There is one particular scene in which he lifts a chair easily, as if it is made out of plastic, and throws it at the villain. Very impressive! That is one of the salient scenes of the movie.

You must see the way he runs. Man... I wish I had the get-up of Kamal Khan. Every thing he does has a superhero touch. For instance the way he punches the goon's balls...! Boy, that send shivers through the viewer's spine! Trust me! I'll not be surprised if the audience screams out of excitement. But... but... but... the best scene I liked was how Kamal Khan twists the arm of two goons, and rotates them "single-handedly". Yes... I mean... “literally” he does it single-handedly - with just one of his very thin and lean hands.

There are many scenes that would inspire a whole generation - such as the one in which he somersaults and snatches the gun from his opponent. Can anyone do that? Can anyone?! No... Absolutely NO! Not even a Hollywood actor can do that.

Wait a minute... Do you think I'm making fun of Kamal Khan? NO... Not at all! Please don't mistaken me. I'm serious folks!!! Do you know why I'm really awed by Kamal Khan? Because he embodies a normal Indian's dream of appearing on the big screen. In spite of having such a voice, get-up, body and acting skill, Kamal Khan made it to the big screen. Had Barak Obama seen the movie during his election campaign, he would have played the Deshdrohi trailer to his supporters, and said - "Yes we can! If Kamal Khan can act in a movie, then YES... WE CAN dream bigger!"

Deshdrohi is one movie that proclaims loudly that anyone can do anything in this world. Pursue your dreams boldly. Whenever you are beaten by failure..., whenever you feel depressed..., if not the movie, at least watch the trailer of Deshdrohi. It will motivate you. It will bring that smile back on your face.

Kung-Fu

“Do you know Kung-Fu?” I asked.

To me, the question appeared logical and natural. After all, he is from China. He might have learned Kung-Fu during his childhood days. And if he knows Kung-Fu, this is a good opportunity for me to pick one-or-two simple Kung-Fu moves. Besides, during dinner time we are supposed to exchange pleasantries lest boredom would creep in.

With a giggle my Chinese colleague shook his head and said "No". He continued with his Chinese English "Not all Chinese know Kung-Fu. Only little know. People of other country think all Chinese know Kung-Fu." With that he laughed.

That resonated well with me. I have come across Westerners, who have asked me about snake charmers. Not whether I charm snakes, but whether snake charming is common in India. I used to wonder what made them ask such silly questions. Now I knew. They did so to avoid boredom!

It is good to EXPERIENCE different perspectives. I thought.

"Alright. So... where is this Shaolin temple?" I continued...

The power of blog...

A few weeks back I was at my sister's place. My mom too had come down. The house-maid was on leave, and hence, all the household chores had to be taken care by my mom and sis.

After having lunch, I had to take leak, and also complete a small work-item. Without bothering to wash my dish, I walked out from the kitchen only to be stopped by my mom's rumble. I turned and looked at her eyes. The message was loud and clear. Silently I took my dish to the dish-sink, washed, and kept it on the utensil-stand.

I, then, headed to the toilet. My mom saw this, and mistook my "pee urge" as the reason behind my rush, and "inappropriate behavior" of not washing my dish. (Actually she was wrong. My bladder had enough room for more pee. :-) Anyways, the point is: she misread it.)

While I was relieving myself, she knocked the toilet door and said "Sorry". Bemused, I said "No problem" and continued emptying my bladder.

When I went back to the kitchen, my sister and mom were smiling. I asked what happened. To which my sister replied what my mom told her a few minutes back. With genuine concern and alarm she had said: "I shouldn't have stopped him. He will now go and put this incident on his blog!!"

While all of us broke into a heavy and hearty laughter, between laughs I said: "Now, THIS part... qualifies to be on the blog"

After that incident, these days I tease my mom telling her that I'll put on blog whatever she does,. I have found my little way of blackmailing ;-) I now know the power of blog.

Meet my crush...

The inkling starts around the age of 12. From that till his death, a guy keeps adding numerous ladies to his list of crushes. Out of those, some would score a perfect 10-out-of-10, while others would score a little less.

I too have had my list of crushes, perfect-10s..., and heartbreaks! Yes... heartbreaks :-(

Do you know how it feels to see your perfect-10 playing with her kid, whom you have NOT fathered?! It feels terrible! Like waves, those good old sweet memories would rush-in - one after the other - followed by jealousy, and then disappointment, before depression sets in. Then numbness would touch the heart, and would register on the face, in the form of a gloomy smile! To feel what I just said, you need to have the heart of a guy, and at least one perfect-10!

The feeling that encompasses the above paragraph seized me when I saw my perfect-10 with her kid. Her eyes had not lost that old sparkle, which had mesmerized me. The smile was as beautiful as ever. And the vermilion... - I have to admit - looked so good on her. Alas, I couldn't put it on her. Her son had her eyes, and his face carried the hint of a naughty smile, which made him adorable.

Memories came rushing in. It wasn't long back when I had put a reminder in the yahoogroups condoling and condemning her wedding anniversaries. Now, here she is with her 2 year old son! Time indeed flies - faster than one thinks. I smiled at myself. As I was surrendering to the numbness, my friend SMS-d me: "Who is your favorite Malayalam actress?"

I looked at her photo once again... and replied "Samyuktha Verma".

Before folding the magazine, which carried Samyuktha's and her son's photo, I grinned and thought: "Time to hop to my next crush". I picked my cell and SMS-d my friend once again: "... and Meera Jasmin". After all, I have the heart of a guy... to move on... from one crush to the other ;-)

I humbly accept this award!

Hello World. Thanks a bunch for voting me to get this award. I sincerely appreciate your support. I humbly accept this award.

If the award is a news to you, please click here to see the video.

Special thanks to Sanjay for nominating me...

PS: If the link does not work because of site maintenance issues, just make a note of the fact that I was awarded the "World's greatest business mind"

India made Car

A couple of weeks back I was at Delhi traveling in a cab with my Chinese college, who happened to be on his first trip to India.

While observing the traffic he came across an Ambassador car. With "eureka excitement" written all over his face, he pointed at the car and asked me "Indian Car!?"

I said: "Yes... an old model. It is called the Ambassador."

The Chinese smiled and replied in broken English "In China, no such cars... Only in Village". with a broad smile on his face he shook his head and laughed.

"Sala.. he is speaking as if he is coming from some developed nation. Rural China is not so advanced" I mumbled in my mind. My Indian pride was obviously hurt a bit.

The Chinese continued in his Chinese accent: "Is there other Indian made Car?"

I looked around for an answer and saw one Maruti SX4 behind our car. I was about to show him the SX4 when I saw the big Suzuki Logo in front of it. I thought: "What... !!? There is no India based car companies that manufacture good quality cars!? Forget good quality, at least one good looking one so that I can show this Chinese fellow!?"

God answered that question quickly. Suddenly an Indigo passed our Innova.

At its sight, I leaped forward, pointed at it and almost shouted in excitement: "That one...! That one...! That is 'India made car'!!!".

While he was staring at the Indigo, and perhaps wondering why I got excited, a grin spread on my face. With a relief, I said to myself “God bless the TATAs”

The "Cross and Garlic" of Bangalore

Cross and garlic are used to ward off vampires, who normally disguise as ordinary human beings. Cross and garlic protect the place from a vampire attack.

Kannada Paksha Flag is used by businessmen to ward off goons, disguised as Kannnada patrons, from attacking their establishments. The Kannada Paksha flag is supposed to protect establishments, which fetch business for Bangalore, from the attack of hooligans.

My Chinese Name: 威沙 奥古斯丁

I work in a Chinese company.

One of my Chinese Collegues explained the Chinese meaning of my name. It is funny and interesting...

Here it goes:

My first name is written as 威沙

威 means tall and 沙 means strong. It is pronounced as Wei (威) Sha (沙)

My last name is written as 奥古斯丁. Out of which only 古 - pronounced as "Gu"- has a meaning. The rest are just syllables. 古 means ancient.

All in all in a nut shell: The Chinese people find it easy to pronounce my name. Coz I'm an ancient , tall and strong man ;-)

Take my breath away

A bus journey... from Bangalore to Calicut. It takes approx 8 hours to cover the distance.

Time: Around 10:00 PM. The guy walks in. He slumps onto the seat next to me. He is drunk!

"What a luck!" I murmured angrily. The guy was stinking with alcohol. I used to wonder why such 'spirits' drink and travel?! What pleasure they get!? What 'kick' they get by releasing their 'spirit' in an air-tight enclosed bus!?

Sometime back a friend enlightened me that the spirit they drink helps them sleep well. Hence they drink and travel!!! Wah...! What profound social nuisances!

A boiling me cannot sleep. But I have to. I started counting till 100 to calm myself down. I knew my act won't help much. But that was the best bet I had to get a good sleep. Somewhere at the count of 100000000901 I slept.

*****

Time: 3ish in the morning...

A stinking smell of alcohol wakes me up. Half awake, I turn my head to my left-hand side, and slightly lift my eyelid. I see my neighbor's snoring wide-open mouth threatening to eat my nose; his uvula dancing to his snore.

I grin.

In my stupor I lift my palm and smell my breath. Terrible! The chilly chicken (my dinner) had rotten well. With my palm still facing my mouth, I redirect my fingers to my neighbor's nose... and then... BLOW HARD ONTO MY PALM and thereby onto his nose. I repeat the same three or four times.

The snoring stops! The alcohol stink stops! And I go back to my sleep.

*****

When I woke up in the morning I saw the 'drunkard' sitting in some other seat.

*****

Fellow travelers, follow the example I set. ;-)

*****

DISCLAIMER: This post is a work of NON-fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are NOT the products of the author's imagination. Any resemblance to actual events or persons, living or dead, is NOT coincidence. They actually happened

Underprivileged?

Who is an underprivileged kid? A kid who commutes in auto-rickshaw and carries one of the most flashy mobile handsets? The English definition of underprivileged is "Lacking the rights and advantages of other members of society".

My friend is a project manager with around 8 years of experience in IT industry. A few days back I met him at a bus stop. He told me he was waiting for a bus!! He doesn't have a car or a motorbike. He is no miser. I can vouch for that. So then... why bus and not an auto-rickshaw!!?? Because he (and I) think the rickshaw-walas of Bangalore are looters who charge exorbitantly and extort money from their passengers. He said he couldn't afford their charges, which seldom go by the meter. Hence commuting by bus.

My relative has three kids studying in a "privileged" school in Bangalore. None of them carry mobile handsets. They don't have the latest computer and accessories at their home. All they have is an obsolete model that gives them constant trouble.

Why am I bringing up all these?

One of my part time activities is to teach "underprivileged" kids as a volunteer of an NGO. I teach them computer basics. I admit there are a bunch of kids who are truly underprivileged. But when I see some others walking into the classroom with flashy mobile phones, and see them commuting in auto-rickshaws, I wonder why am I spending time here teaching “underprivileged” kids, who appear to be truly privileged!! Had I had to teach privileged kids, I would be teaching my near-and-dear “privileged” kids! That would be far more rewarding! Besides, they truly lack the advantages a mobile phone or a rickshaw can offer!

I'm not ignoring other aspects these "underprivileged" kids might be having, such as, a troubled family. But then, it is also my choice and impression, which I can't ignore. I would prefer working for the upliftment of those kids who do lack mobile handsets and who, like other common people in India, commute by bus!

Perhaps the truly underprivileged are unable to find their way to my class. Perhaps the teacher should go out searching for them...

The Kite Runner

Read "The Kite Runner" of Khaled Hosseini. A good page turner. Khaled knows the art of story telling...

To some extend, The Kite Runner educated me about Afghan people, their culture, and their problems. After reading the novel I had the urge to watch this novel over celluloid. The movie version turned out to be a damp squib. The director and the script-writer could not do justice to the novel.

Given below are a few interesting quotes from the novel.

Baba: You'll never learn anything of value from those bearded idiots - the mullas. Piss on the beards of all those self-righteous monkeys. They do nothing but thumb their prayer beads and recite a book written in a tongue they don't even understand. God help us all if Afghanistan ever falls into their hands.

Baba: No matter what the mullah teaches, there is only one sin, only one. And that is theft. Every other sin is a variation of theft.

Amir: That's the thing about people who mean everything they say. They think everyone else does too.

Firsts in Photography...

Came across this link that talks about the firsts in photography: http://www.maxpower.ca/a-timeline-of-imagery-firsts/2007/10/03/

A good one...